Room 402, Wednesday afternoon

[hurtingzeebo]

Sam was all dressed up. She had on her rattiest, dirtiest clothes, extra ripped just for the occasion, and drizzled with barbecue sauce. She had a pale green foundation on, with excess, smeared eyeliner creating a very baggy effect around her eyes, and more barbecue sauce around her mouth, over black lipstick. She had her hair fluffed out into oblivion. With just a touch more barbecue sauce.

Look, it hadn't been easy to get all of that on her without eating it all, okay?

Last but not least, she had the soy brain from Diversity class out of its jar and leaking soy brain juice all over her hands. She'd put some more barbecue sauce on it, too, not just for texture. She expected it was going to taste pretty wretched.

Now all she needed was her oh-so-gullible and oh-so-traumatizable boyfriend to arrive, and she'd be all set.

[ooc: for him what's mentioned in the narrative, though it can be open for after that.]

Comments

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

Freddie, for his part, was mainly planning on dropping by to go over iCarly sketch ideas. And he was so preoccupied with such that he hadn't even knocked on Sam's door before he'd entered.

And then when he'd shut the door behind him, he turned around and finally got a good look.

"Oh sweet chiz!" he exclaimed, his papers going everywhere as he threw up his arms.

[hurtingzeebo]

Never one to back down from committing her all to a good prank, Sam immediately started gnawing on the soy brain when Freddie walked in. At the flailing, she added in some eye rolling and a touch of moaning.

Just for spice.

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

Freddie for his part whimpered and flailed.

"Awww, come on," he cried. "Why? Why her? Why?"

He looked around for something to defend himself with. He then produced a whistle from his pocket. "I'll... I'll use it!" he said.

Because that would work.

[hurtingzeebo]

Sam let the brain ooze from her teeth as she waved her arms in the air and stalked towards him.

She was really curious to see what he'd try to do with that whistle.

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

Freddie threw the whistle at her.

"I warned you!" he said, in as manly a voice as he could muster.

[hurtingzeebo]

Sam let the whistle bounce off her forehead and groaned again. "Your whistle is no match for zombie!Saaaaaam," she intoned.

What? Zombies totally talked in complete sentences, right?

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

That gave Freddie a moment of pause.

"Wait, you're a talking zombie?" he said, suddenly a bit more suspicious than terrified.

[hurtingzeebo]

Sam let a little more brain ooze from her mouth. "How many zombies have you met, exactly?" she moaned, still shuffling at him.

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Not many," Freddie said, making a somewhat disgusted face. "Actually, zero. I've seen the ones down at the karaoke place. They're not so chatty."

He hesitated. "Oh man, this is a trap, isn't it? Super smart Sam zombie's gonna eat my face."

[hurtingzeebo]

Awww, he thought she was super smart! Sam was just going to ignore the "for a zombie" part of that.

"Mmm," she moaned. "Faaaaace." Then she flailed some more and opened her mouth wide while still walking towards him.

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Tell my mom I love her!" Freddie said, shutting his eyes and bracing for being eaten. He had to admit, in all the ways he could go, being eaten by his girlfriend as a zombie? Not the worst he could think of.

[hurtingzeebo]

Sam came right in close, probably breathing a hefty dose of soy-brain-and-barbecue-sauce in his face, before pulling back.

"I have got to teach you some self-defense moves."

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Awwwww come on!" Freddie said, opening his eyes and looking utterly saddened. "How am I supposed to defend myself against you?"

He knew some defense moves, he just... well, hurting Sam was not in his nature.

[hurtingzeebo]

"Well, using something more than a thrown whistle as a weapon might be a good start." She grinned and backed up, reaching up to pick a bit of soy brain from her teeth with her finger nail. "'Tell my mom I love her!'" she teased. "When, exactly, would zombie-me be talking to your mom?"

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"...when you ate her next?" Freddie said, sputtering a little. "Oh man, what was that, any way? That brain was super gross."

Really, really gross.

[hurtingzeebo]

"Isn't it the greatest?" Sam practically bounced. "It's soy brain! My diversity teacher gave it to me."

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Soy brain?" Freddie said. "Wait, so it... tastes like brain, or soy?"

He wasn't sure if he liked the idea of Sam eating something that tasted like brain.

[hurtingzeebo]

"Never had soy," Sam said. "But it's not super-brainy. Mostly it tastes like barbecue sauce."

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"That's probably the barbeque sauce," Freddie said, pointing at it. "That was really not cool, by the way. But... kinda funny, yeah, I'll admit that."

[hurtingzeebo]

"My teacher gave me the idea. She's the best." Sam tilted her head. "And I'm pretty sure hell just froze over."

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Because I admitted it was funny? I'm not saying it was cool, just... funny," Freddie said. "And I will get my revenge. Somehow."

He didn't have a Gibby to handcuff her to, so this would take thinking on his part.

[hurtingzeebo]

"No you won't," Sam said. "I meant 'cause I just said I like a teacher."

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Oh," Freddie said, mulling that one over. "Yeah, that is new. She teaches diversity?"

That didn't normally seem like a Sam thing.

[hurtingzeebo]

"This week? We covered zombies. She's a demon."

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Like, literally?" Freddie said, making sure. "Horns, pointy tail?"

That is what Freddie thought of, at least, when thinking of demons.

[hurtingzeebo]

"Horns. I don't think she has a tail, though."

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Wow, I guess I see why that would be a teacher you like," Freddie said, smiling even though he knew he would get pain for that joke.

[hurtingzeebo]

"I can still eat your face off, you know."

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"But you like my face," Freddie said, trying to be charming.

It sort of worked.

[hurtingzeebo]

"Mmmm," Sam agreed, sidling up. "I bet it'll taste real good, too."

What? Wasn't she sexy with those barbecue lips?

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"You've... you've got a little," Freddie said, pointing up to her lips. "Just so you know."

[hurtingzeebo]

Sam licked slowly across her lips. "Did I get it?"

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"You know, if it weren't for all the zombie make-up, that would've been pretty sexy," Freddie said, after being momentarily at a loss for words.

[hurtingzeebo]

"Rrrrrah!" Sam said, making chompy noises at him.

[randomspanish.livejournal.com]

"Hey, hey," Freddie said, laughing and mock-trying to push her away. "No biting! At least... not hard. Minor biting at most."

[hurtingzeebo]

"Mmm, give zombie-momma some sugar, baby."